I figured I should post something

Well your mom has a ticker that says 223 more days till your here, It seems like a damn eternity. I can't believe how cranky your mom is, I know she is goin through changes I think I have been on edge with her lately too. I keep thinking about everything we need to get done around the house. I am going to start peeling wall paper in the nursery and I wanna put down a laminate floor and replace one more door. The fence in the back yard was done today and the fence company doesnt put in straight runs of fence, so Im going to call them tomorrow and let them know its time to come back to straighten the fence at least the two sections that caught my eye. I have also been thinking of getting a second or third shift job to make ends meet. It really sucks being comfortable living a certain way then having to possibly lose a income for a while or get 1/2 of said income back. I dont know. What I do know is Im excited for the baby to come. I am also going to have to admitt as much as I read about fathers that are expecting wondering about their own mortality it has struck me once or twice that April and I are bringing a life into the world that I am going to be responsible for, for the rest of my life or till there 18 lol. Also am I healthy will I live long enough, god I hope nothing happens to me type of thoughts. Or You April. Well thats it for tonight this span'd over two nights so

Timber

Yesterday, Timber and I went to Fidelco for his puppy class. He missed his first play class due to a mutant straind of fleas, but we prevailed buddy all the bombing and bathing was worth it to see you with your litter mates and to do some obedience training. I was so proud of you, you did everything I asked and didnt whine and whimper. I hope you turn into a great guide dog.

Your 2nd Dr Appt

Well I met your mother at the the Dr's office waited a half hour and then we got into a room. I watched the screen to see if I could see your beating before the Dr pointed it out and zoomed in I was for a moment scared I didnt see it. Im a nervous nellie I geuss. The Dr says everything looks good I am so thankfull for that, Im still wondering wether or not your gonna be daddy's little girl or daddy's little boy. I just hope your healthy. And on a totally different subject we saw the girl that went in before us to the Dr she was only 17 and is 3 months pregnant. I was amazed it is scary for me let alone a baby having a baby. Jeez. Well more to come

OUR FIRST DR. APPOINTMENT

Well I told you it may not be Monday that you get to see the post little one. I got out of work early to meet your mom for the appointment, let me tell you how AWKWARD it was being a man on Monday , walking into a obgyn office. Well I met the Dr with your mom, she has been going to him for awhile. I thought he was funny. He is kinda Brash but I liked it. He let us know the risks of losing you our little poppy seed at this time, the odds werent that great I told your mom that is other people not us.We will be fine. The Dr told us in the next week or so your heart will start beating and beating faster then our's do now, and when your heart starts beating our chances of losing you drop to 10 %. That will be great. Your mother has had blood drawn twice this week and is bruised up good. We are waiting to hear if the hGC levels in your mother are doubling like they are supposed to wich I hope they are, and believe me I couldnt explain to you what that is. Let me tell you now I have been trying to spring this on your grandfather and great grandma for christmas it is hard to keep this a secret I want them so badly to know. It will be 13 more days till they know. I have been getting the central air buttoned up for your mother this is just a project that was never finished and needs to before you get here. I also started ripping the doors down in your new room too I want you to have a cool nursery. So Ill let you go know Ill tell you more when I know more.................Dad

our future child

Well today your Mother and I got tell important people to us and hopefully important to you, about your pending arrival. We are both so very excited, I have wanted to be a Daddy for awhile now, your mother has had the itch to be a mommy since we got engaged. But I am very scared and I cant seem to figure out why? There are so many things I am wondering about, I cant even put my finger on it. I am nervous yet excited am I ready to be a Dad, YES. I know your mother is ready she is a natrual with babies. I know your grandmothers are freaking so excited. I hope your mom reliezes that I am excited about this major event, I just dont know what to say or do I am sort of lost. I am going to be a Dad, I will no longer be the son I am taking on a new role in the family. It means things are coming full circle I guess. I hope I can be the father you want the one I never had until I was adopted. I am going to try to keep writing until your born but it may not be frequent so please understand. I will try to keep your Big yellow brother Tucker ready for your arrival he is good with his foster brother Timber so lets hope he is as happy to see you too. I get to go with mom to her first prenatal Dr.s appt. I will write more then to you about it.....

not been felling so well

for like a week now I have been feeling off, you know your body you know when something is not right. I am your typical man i dont go to the Dr.s office till i have to or april makes me. Well the whole not feeling myself started last sunday so on wednesday when my manly parts started to feel pain I called the dr and went as soon as possible. I go and he checks me out and says I think you have a kidney stone take this med every 6 hours and if the symptoms dont go away call me and we will have you come back in oh and he made me pee in a cup. Fast forward to friday when I was feeling dizzy and nausea I called the dr and asked what did you find in my urine sample oh we were going to call you, mind you its almost 3 pm on friday they proceed to tell me that my urine told them my blood sugar was somewhere by 1000 when its supposed to be like 80 to 120 so they think i may be diabetic. And protein levels where high also. So I started thinking about this past week and day I had a cream cheese pastry at the office instantly felt nausea I thought it was cause I was hungry and i didnt have breakfast, So i started to go to my job site for the day and stoped and got 2 arizona ice tea the big sweet yummy ones and drank them by noon and still felt like crap went to lunch couldnt finish half of the green salad I bought. then find out what I already posted earlier about and started just drinking water and started feeling a little better and I have now stayed away from sugar for the night and feel so much better but Istill have to do something about this.

Boy April's meme really caused confusion

So this is to shed more light on me, or my past. My biological mother got pregnant with me when she was 15, gave birth to me like a month and half after she turned 16. I really believe that was a bad idea. You dont get to grow up the way every kid should. I was moved around alot as a kid, I have lived in Texas, Rhode Island, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Vermont, Florida, I believe that is all but it is hard to keep all the "FACTS" straight. The father I had known till I was like 6 or 7 was in the middle of trying to leave my mother and I wanted to stay with him and then my mother told me he wasnt my real father and that my real father's name is Frank and that is all she knows about him. He doesnt know about me ether..It is intriging to think about. I really dont dwell on it. But while my mother was with my so called father, she had a another two sons and a daughter in that short time frame. Well then I was sent to live with a aunt in Connecticut have you ever had the feeling you werent wanted that is how I felt, Well as soon as my mothers sister found out my mother was in New Hampshire I was packed up with the little bit of shit that I had at a age 7 oor 8 and deposited on my other aunts door step that my mother was staying with. My mother got her ass in line probably by the time I was 9 and I moved in with her at a apartment she got. I then met a guy she was going to marry and that is when I got sent to Florida to live with my mothers oldest sister all because she got arrested and was dealing drugs and the state of vermont was going to take me away from her. So Now Im living in Fla, with my 2 cousins and my aunt who is divorced, she met a guy that she worked with and ended up marrying him. My cousin is a year younger then me and just as big he always had a special learning problem. I think he wasnt wired right he always got into fights with teachers and students and this new husband of my aunts. Well one day I witnessed my new uncle choking my 12 year old cousin and I had to help this cousin. He was like my brother well we ended up kicking said new uncles ass and he told my aunt that it was me or him and I cant blame her for what she choose, but I was sent back to Connecticut to live my uncle and his wife the youndest of my moms siblings I had now lived with all the aunts and uncles I had lol. I ended up finshing Highschool and then got kicked out at 18 and that puts you to my 15 years meme.... Today I was going to tell you all about my asshole side but no you had to ask questions so you got this...